In a sea of beautiful women, it’s hard to stand out. It’s easy to get discouraged and shrink into our small self when we gauge the “competition” as better than us. Watching the latest episode of reality TV dating show, The Bachelor, I examined what separated the front runners from the rest of the pack, and here is what I found:
Be vulnerable (not surprisingly). When a woman led with, “I’m so nervous to share this with you,” the Bachelor took notice and leaned in. Showing your fear but staying in connection can be incredibly attractive. It shows that you have the confidence to admit your fears, and the strength to jump in regardless.
Love your outfit. You don’t have to be a model or even have expensive clothes to do this. All you need is to pick an outfit that makes you feel yummy. If you don’t know a thing about what kind of style you have, start by picking something that compliments your skin and body type. You will be amazed by how simply finding your “colors” can really change the way you feel in your clothes. Go a step further and pick flattering cuts and fabrics for your body. No matter what size you are, every body has certain styles that are more flattering than others.
Be Bold. By bold, I mean to own what you want. And keep it simple. Want to break out in dance in the middle of the restaurant. Do it. Steal a kiss before appetizers, mm hmm. Don’t hesitate to let your date know that you are looking for a good time (if that is what you want).
Be Mysterious. At the same time, don’t reveal all your cards. A secure person doesn’t feel the need to disclose their life story on the first few dates. Starting to tell him about your bird that died in 3rd grade is cute, but can lead to snoozeville if you aren’t sticking to mostly current events. The person in front of you wants to get to know the you that is right in front of them before they will appreciate the sweet childhood anecdotes.
Have a sense of Humor. Humor is important, especially these days when everything has to be politically correct. No matter what, you are bound to offend someone. That shouldn’t stop you from taking risks and learning to laugh at life’s ups and downs. Just make sure that you are available to receive impact if you do indeed offend someone.
Don’t take it personally. Sometimes the connection is just not there. You could have showed up as the most fabulous Hawaiian Tropic model on the whole island. Yet, you and your date may just not be a match. Don’t start picking apart your traits. Comparing yourself to others will only make you feel worse or have to put someone down in order to feel better. People are surprisingly open about what they will accept as physically attractive. So don’t fall into the trap of “I’m not pretty or thin enough, “ 9 out of 10 times thats not the case.
What do you think? What makes someone stand out in a crowd?
